By Helen Borel, R.N.,Ph.D.
I take the word “sex” to connote “life force.” In other words, our sexual being encompasses
considerably more than attraction to another, intimacy with that other, and the sex act. Instead I view the Sexual Self as an undiscovered infiniteness yearning to be found. As the life force of the individual which is sadly hidden, suppressed by the taboos of society, parents, teachers, peers and the individual him- or herself.
The Sexual Self is the fullness of being; it is the complete Self. When an awareness of this totalness is blocked, mental distress ensues in the various forms of psychiatric illnesses. Depression, for example, is generally accepted as the norm of daily life without the masses of depressed individuals being aware they are depressed. They believe they are simply normally subdued and well-mannered. It is the price people pay for the widely-conditioned massive shut-down of enthusiasm, curiosity, self-esteem, enjoyment of work, creativity, and empathy for others. So the crushed life force, the diluted Sexual Self, is deluded by false beliefs into disappearing from consciousness. Which absence produces anger, anxiety, insomnia and depression.
It’s true that there are various causes of depression. And that a good many depressive illnesses are known to arise genetically - such as the depression of bipolar disorder. While a good many others can be attributed to, possibly reversible, biochemical imbalances; upsets in our biochemistry which affect our immune system functioning and our brain chemical activity. And these alterations affect our mood states.
So very many variables can upset the delicate balance of our neuroimmune system. And one or more of these will directly impact our physiologic feeling states and will produce unpleasant moods. These can include family and work stresses; chronic health problems; nutritional deficits; inhaled and ingested pollutants and pesticides in our air, water and food; ingrained negative belief systems; learned hatreds; physical abuse; emotional abuse; and alcohol and other substance abuse. I would add to these causative factors for depression Unexpressed Creativity.
Sexuality, thus, encompasses lifeforceness. It is Selfness fully expanded and expressed, thoroughly permeating one’s existence and infusing the very Self and the world beyond the Self with the full awareness of expansive, vibrant energy. It is creativity expressed by the Expressor, the creative one, you.
Unfortunately, most people think of their Sexual selves through the narrowest of definitions, which seem to pivot around the quantity and quality of orgasm.
I postulate, however, that orgiastic capacity includes those experiences not usually thought of as genital or erotically titillating. For example, the ecstasy of creative work, scientific investigation, and social activism that achieve exciting results. In other words, what
Abraham Maslow called “self-actualization.”
We know, of course, that the psychoneuroimmune system of neuroimmune transmitters (chemical messengers) is replete with signals that bring us either distress or satisfaction. We know that activity, like running, can relieve some levels of depression. And, I have learned that action binds anxiety. These alleviations resulting from behaviors are undoubtedly due to cerebral enkephalins and specifically the brain’s own opioids, the endorphins. So too with self-actualization, the reaching for the fullest of one’s being, for the widest expression of one’s sensient Sexual Self.
Self-actualization is actually Self-growth, Self-expansion to one’s fullest possibilities.
Therefore, genital sexualness can only be a small smidgeon of that vastness of being.
The creative process unexpressed or dampened down injures a person and progressively traumatizes the individual to the point of shrinking the active psyche, crushing inventive thought, and probably damaging love and genital sex in the process. This is because a fully engaged artist is happy, content and therefore more capable of sharing positive emotions with loved ones.
While a covert or wannabe artist is slouching toward grief and depression due to the buriedness of the true Sexual Self.
So, the process of creativity liberates one’s life force...or Sexual Self...progressively
pressing that Self toward further liberation, further creativity, further total sexual beingness. This process, and the higher and higher levels of self-achievement with its ultimate
capture of one’s Real Self moves far beyond ordinary genital sexual needs. The resulting ever-expanding life force and ripples of creative evolution thereby generate an ecstasy that lasts much
longer and is much more dependable for steady human satisfaction than are a few minutes of genital orgasm.
© Copyright 2008-2015 Dr. Helen Borel. All rights reserved.
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For Interactive, Interventional, Creative PsychoTherapy - by this author of Journey Into Self: Holistic Interactive Integrative Psychoanalysis - that gets your life, your career, and your love relationship away from suffering and on to fulfillment, write to me at emotional_health@earthlink.net
You can call me Dr. Helen
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